I have always looked forward to each new year with hope and excitement. I love thinking about resolutions, warmer weather, and fun plans. I even remember being oddly hopeful as Y2K approached. But not 2020 – I sincerely don’t want it to come.
No offense to 2020 and all you dreamers out there. I’m sure it will bring many wonderful things. I already have some exciting plans: a bachelorette party in Austin, a trip to Antigua, and one of my best friends’ weddings. It’s not so much about the new year; my hesitation for 2020 comes as I look at my little girls. I want time to stop. To stand still, in 2019, just for a while longer.
Don’t get me wrong, 2019 wasn’t all puppies & rainbows. It came with sass, the pushing of boundaries, fighting and whining. But it also came with so much more. We started the year with sentences and ended it speaking in full paragraphs as they tell us about their day. We went from slow waddling bike rides to zooming around while I yell out regular reminders to ‘slow down’ or ‘wait for mommy’. We went from nervously watching others on the playground to flying down slides and wanting to go ‘one more time’. They have even become moderately helpful in the kitchen, can fold their own laundry and are much better at picking up after themselves. Their sense of adventure, their imagination, and their ability to express themselves has all changed more than I anticipated it would in one short year.
I realize more and more every day that I don’t have babies any more. They are quickly becoming kids. I want a few more cuddles, a few more bubble baths, a few more paint nights and pig piles with my chubby cheeked little darlings. I’d even take a few more lunches where I have to tell them to quit bugging one another so they can eat. Time seems to be flying by, and I am trying to embrace it and slow it down but each day they grow smarter & taller still.
Any parent of two or three year old’s will tell you it isn’t easy, and two at a time doesn’t simplify anything, but there are lots of wonderful things about the ‘terrible twos’ and the ‘threenager’ years, which is why I certainly won’t wish away 2019. In fact, if I could, I would tuck my girls away in a snow globe and keep them just as they are forever. With their eyes full of wonder, their sense of innocent curiosity and their loving mischievous grins.
However, since I obviously can’t do that, I will just do my best to embrace all that comes my way in 2020. I’ll take the good times with the hard times, the giggles and the tears and I will do my best to make the best of each moment I can.
Cheers to each of you and yours as you embark on a new year.
What are you looking forward to most?